kerrianne. 16. ohio.
GPOY | ask | picplz

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I miss Tumblr.

We will be together soon. I know it.

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Sitting in my fourth period by myself, while everyone is having a great time. I haven’t said a word to anyone.

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I’m gonna be just fine.

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When I first met this boy, he was bald. He was wearing shitty MMA gear, and old basketball shorts. And his pumas weren’t in the best condition. But, he caught my eye. He interested me. He made me laugh. And he bought me Arizona sweet tea. Personality wise, he had it all. And he still does. He still makes me laugh, he’s embarrassing as hell sometimes, and he has one thing that makes him stand out from everyone in the entire world: despite anything he does to me, I never stray. I fight for him until I have absolutely no strength left. And at the end of the day, we’re always okay. We have never, in the past 9 months, gone to bed angry at each other. It may take us hours to get our issue resolved, but there has never been a night when we have gone to bed angry. And for me, that’s a success. The distance makes things hard for us, but we make us work. Lately, things haven’t been easy. Saying they’ve been some of the hardest weeks of my life would almost be an understatement. The fights we’ve had, and the things he’s put me through, have been near impossible to deal with. I’m running out of strength. I put every ounce of myself into us, to make it work, because that’s my job. But, it gets stressful. And being the only one who fights for a relationship makes spending every day a little harder, knowing that any second, you could be put on the spot to draw the other person back in. The sad part about that is, I don’t know how much longer I can fight. How much longer I can be the only one who spends hours trying to show the other person just why they’re there. It’s a tough job, and it should be something that a couple shares, at least 49%, 51%. Having it be 70%, 30% is rough, and it’s wearing on me. But even after getting left at prom, even after every single time he’s told me that we shouldn’t be together, I never left. I stayed through it all. Because falling asleep on the phone every night with a boy that loves me, and that I love, is worth the fights. It’s worth being the one who puts in the most effort, despite how much I hate it. It’s worth being the only one who changes, because he’s worth it. Everything he does makes the shitty parts of this relationship worth it, and it makes how scared I get sometimes worth it. It makes his anger issues worth it (and I’d hope he’d say the same about mine). We’re dysfunctional and it’s hard to say if we have the strength to put up with each other for forever. But my naive heart will hope that one day, I’ll get to wake up and fall asleep to his heartbeat.

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Long talks with old friends. <3 (Taken with instagram)

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Made @joshwacocks go out and play in the rain with me :D (Taken with instagram)

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free-lancer:

(via Wall Photos on we heart it / visual bookmark #24811459)

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black people: black pride!
native people: native pride!
latino people: latino pride!
gay people: gay pride!
white people: white pri- *stabbed and then burned alive*

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